("My Ultimate" will run most Tuesdays (0k, it is almost Wednesday) and will feature any topic that hops into my head. The views expressed here do not necessarily reflect those of the other New England Mamas. . . although they should).
Every time we go, we talk about a little girl who died.
"How old was she, Mommy?"
"Why did she die?"
"What was her name?"
"Was this all hers?"
I tell them what I can:
She was 9.
She had a lot of things go wrong with her body, but, in many ways, she lived a life a lot like your own.
Her name was Julia.
She used to visit this park with her parents. After she died, they wanted to do something to celebrate her life that other children could enjoy too.
It is such a sad story.
And yet, Julia's Garden, found in WWI Memorial Park in North Attleboro, Massachusetts is anything but sad as the sound of children laughing and shrieking fills the air.
It is a place that has parents gazing around in awe at the artistic benches, life-size unicorn (well, what I imagine 'life-size' would be), and the hundreds of flowering bushes.
It has us choking back tears as we read about the little girl for whom this garden is named.
But, it is also a place where kids excitedly climb a rope ladder to slide down the longest slide I've ever seen.
Where they get squirted in the face with water.
Where they can run up a wooded hill and find a large playground with more slides, swings, cars and picnic tables.
It is a place any child would love. And, while I am glad I am able to make such happy memories with my children there, I will always think of that little girl. May she be able to see all that she has left behind.
This is a touching story.
It's hard to talk about death to children. It's unbearable to hear them, "Why did She die?" Because even if you explain the reason they'd still ask why.
I know wherever she is, Julia is happy to see a lot of children loving their time in her garden. I think that's what she's wanted. :)
Posted by: Yvie | June 03, 2008 at 11:06 PM
Oh that looks magical.
Posted by: AlphaDogMa | June 04, 2008 at 12:11 AM
I've been there with my boyz. I especially love the wishing well.
It's a great playground and a wonderful tribute to a little girl!
Posted by: In the Trenches of Mommyhood | June 04, 2008 at 09:07 AM
Ok, I am normally a crier but I am completely sobbing.
I can't wait to visit this park.
Posted by: AMC | June 04, 2008 at 11:27 AM
It is amazing what these parents have done. The unimaginable has happened to them and they are keeping their daughter's memory alive while making other kids happy. This is almost a weekly visit for us - we're lucky to live so close.
Posted by: Shannon | June 04, 2008 at 11:30 AM
I remember the night she asked me what it meant to die. How does one explain that to a little girl? I asked her why she asked me that question and she replied, "Because Jesus told me in my dream that I could die."
Julia was developmentally delayed. We didn't go to church. I didn't know she knew who Jesus was, never mind what death was. Julia informed me she was not ready to die yet.
Shortly after this emotional night, I had a dream. I dreamed that I was standing in a memorial garden that we built in memory to our daughter....
Julia died 6 months later.
During the her 5 months in ICU Julia was awake and very interactive. Despite her occassional ventilator and scores of abdominal and chest drains she still sat up in bed and played nintendo, had tea parties, played cards and blew bubbles. If she happened to be on a ventilator post surgery, she adapted and blew the bubbles with the vent. The other kids in the ICU unit that were on ventilators were medicated asleep and hands tied down. Not Julia. She's was sitting up playing "Go Fish" and watching Veggietales. She had elaborate hand signals for everything! She was a rather bossy individual who tended to rewrite "the rules"! Even her passing was unique and radiantly peaceful. The energy in her room that morning was powerful.
Julia has an amazing strength and spirit. Her life experience taught us about courage and faith and the importance of family. If she can be strong, I can be strong. One small child moved proverbial mountains at Boston Children's Hospital. She transformed the lives of many nurses and doctors through the experience of caring for her. She certainly transformed our lives....and continues to do so.
Through her death, Nicki lives. 12 Weeks after Julia died, Nicki suffered from cardiac arrest due to another error at Children's Hospital and miraculously survived. We owe his life to a handful of ICU staff who so loved Julia that they irrationally continued CPR long after hope had been lost. Through their emotions, tears and sweat they defibrilated Nick a total of 45 times and finally put him on a heart/lung machine. 3 days later, Nick was responsive. There was no heart or brain damage found. Despite the electrical burns on his chest from being "paddled" so much Nick was just fine. His first words were,"I see Julia" and "Can I have some chocolate cake please?" Two weeks later, my son, whose heart did not beat for 2 1/2 hours, walked out of Children's Hospital and came home. His kidney's failed shortly after, we switched hospitals to Mass General, he began dialysis and received a kidney 6 months later from our dear friend Ida. The kidney that Ida desperately had wanted to give Julia.
Nick continues to do well. Julia inspires us on a daily basis. She is still among us, giving us vision and strength. Julia's Garden is a living testimony to a remarkable little girl. She loved nature - it spoke to her. She believed in magic and collected unicorns. She adored playing in the water, digging in the sand, sliding on playground slides and she could swing for hours! This summer we are adding a new play area...a beach area. We spend summers on the Cape and Julia so loved the beach sand and our boat.
She had a rather magnetic personality that drew people to her and in turn, to us. Through the garden, she still does this! Miracles happen through Julia. She spreads her "pixie dust" and makes things happen all the time!
I was overwhelmed when I received a link to this blog. I am overjoyed that Julia's Garden brings happiness to so many. My dream has become manifest in reality. Julia's live has transformed from a caterpillar to a butterfly. The same life. Just a different form. The caterpillar never died. It just changed...
She is here among us, radiant and with wings... Spreading her pixie dust.
I thank you for your kind words and I hold them close to my heart. Thank you for visiting the garden and thank you for getting to know Julia. Please keep in touch, I have a feeling that there is so much more to come...........
With gratitude and love,
Julia's Mom, Lynda Cekala
Posted by: Lynda Cekala | June 19, 2008 at 09:49 AM